Of a certain age

Random Tidbit: You are never to old to have a birthday party.

There is the phrase, “Age is just a number”. A mindset that you can change. We are told to think young and we will be young. There is some truth to that. But I don’t think it’s just for those that want to be young at heart. I think we all have an age in our heart that we hold on to.

For me, I always wanted to be in my thirties. Growing up in a conservative church denomination, flashy, trendy clothes were frowned upon. But I went to public school. With no uniforms, clothes dictated your popularity status. Being a people-pleaser I wanted to fit in. I had a few of the fads, like colorwear jeans and a plaid shirt or two as a nod to the grunge movement. But most of the time my style tended to drift towards blazers and khakis. Much like the character Andrea from the  original Beverly Hills, 90210. Not that I was allowed to watch the show, I merely gleaned her styles from Teen Bop magazine. I was nerdy in High School but in a church girl way. It was never enough to leave me without friends at lunch time. But I never got invited to any of the parties after football games.

So most of my life I have wanted to be in my thirties. Because then I could dress like the stylish thirty something I always wanted to be. So here I am, in my thirties and I am beginning to feel comfortable in my own skin. I have made it thru the teen years and am getting over most of the insecurities that plagued me then. I made it thru college and my early to mid twenties when I wasn’t quite sure who I was or what I was supposed to be. To arrive at this beautiful place of freedom to be whoever God wants me to be. To let go of some of those people pleasing ways and go forward with confidence. I can stop posing as who I think everyone wants me to be and just be me.

I pray the same for you! That you find your place. It can be a long and difficult road. And the world will constantly tell you that you aren’t good enough or that you need to be a different version. This is a lie. I leave you with this quote from Anthony Rapp, “There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.”




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